Phases (Relationship Components)

Phase I – You are amazing!

The Honeymoon

The Bullshit Artist

Boundary Check I (Barely Feel it.)

Boundary Check II (Feels quite noticeable, but not painful.)

Phase II – “Welcome to my web,” said the spider.

Your weak spots have been detected.

Plans are formulated.

Ongoing commentary:

• You’re brilliant.
• You’re my best friend.
• You’re like family to me.

Phase III – Whoa.  You are not perfect?  You’re human?

Your Fall from Grace

Boundary Probe I (Takes advantage of you significantly.)

Insinuates you can’t conduct yourself professionally.

Phase IV – But, magnanimous is me!

You poor ordinary little wretch.

Giving with one hand, stealing with the other.

Suggest hiring other people to help you.

Boundary Probe II (This time there are direct hits on your ethics.)

Phase V – You are such a disappointment!

Second Fall from Grace

No boundaries allowed.

Starts making you look bad to others.

Who’s your daddy?

Phase VI – Time for Torture

Gaslighting

Rages

Abusive

Insults you to others.

Goes out of his / her way to humiliate you.

Phase VII – Shuck-a-Narc

If you are still there, you need to leave NOW.